The Wedding... Finally

Thank you so much for  being so patient with me procrastinating on showing you all the pictures from the wedding. I had such a hard time choosing which pictures that I wanted to share... so here are a bunch.

After having a minor breakdown in the morning with Amber when I realized that I forgot toothpaste, the photographer arrived and started staging my dress and jewelry for photos. Oh... and the surprise gift of sparkling hoops from my hubby cleared those tears right up!

Funny story: I couldn't stand the shoes (pictured above) for the 5 minutes, so I swapped them for a glittery pair that I was planning on wearing at the reception only. I popped this back on for the garter though since that is one of the few times that everyone could see my shoes. 

Also I am super lucky because I had trusted friends and family taking care of my makeup and hair that day. They know how I am on a regular day, therefore they knew exactly what I hoped for on THE special day.

There ceremony was fabulous... and I am so grateful that I didn't wear those PAINFUL and EXPENSIVE shoes. I am weary of putting too many pics online since I don't want to expose anyone virally who is not ready to be all over WIOG. But above are some of my favorites. In the corner of the bottom right photo, you can see my hubby smiling as I am almost back in his arms. We were so excited that we almost kissed then. AND, I swear that I saw him get teary eyed too... but he was able to keep it together so I didn't lose it. 

The reception was a true party. That was probably due to the open bar that helped people get up and dance, but it was fabulous. The corner picture is Amber walking down the isle. Every picture of her looked fabulous. Love that girl. And trust... she was dancing and emphasizing all afternoon.

You will see that I also changed my hairstyle too. It got way too hot dancing! Someone asked why I changed my hair that day, and one of my family remembers replied,
"Because she is FABULOUS!"
Love my family. 

One of the final moments of the evening was the bouquet toss. This moment was just so much fun.

Overall, I have very few regrets about our wedding day. We really enjoyed ourselves and so did all of our guests. I will write up some wedding planning tips and tricks soon to go over what helped make everything run smoothly, and what got messed up. 

Thank you for being so patient with me posting the photos! 

Kim's Wedding Recap

So I promised Kim that I wouldn't leak her pictures from the wedding. But I just could not resist writing a quick post. I will let Kim give you all of the details! Her day was nothing short of beautiful, I am so glad that everything came together well. Kim looked amazing, as everyone knew she would, the weather was gorgeous, a tad too hot for me, but nonetheless we couldn't have prayed for better weather.

I was super nervous about giving my speech, but all went well, and I did it without crying (Fist Pump). We had such an amazing time for two amazing people. I didn't want to give too much away from her special day but here are two quick pics of the Maid Of Honor (Yours Truly). I was super excited that my dress fit! I am so happy for the Newlyweds, and I can't wait for them to get back from their honeymoon so Kim can spill the beans! 

Wedding Update: Less than 30 days away

When I first started writing about the details of my wedding that is happening on August 4th, I thought that it would be something completely new, exciting, and event filled that I would want to share with all of the WIOG readers...

Now that my wedding is almost here, my posts have gotten few and far in between when it comes to disclosing the details of my upcoming special day. Not because I am not excited. Not because I don't  love my fiance. Not because I neglected to keep track of vendors, bridal shops, and other pertinent details to share. BUT because it has been really stressful. Working full time, attending graduate school full time, completing internship hours for my graduate work, writing and creating content for WIOG and planning a wedding has taken a toll on me. I also try to add in maintaining a positive relationship with my fiance, friends, and family here and there too. Oh yea... and fun.

So I have decided to do a wedding recap in segments where I can share all of the nitty gritty details with some fantastic photos that I have taken along the way. So stay tuned for some AMAZING photos and details on how I planned a wedding on a budget in New York. 

And, as a little teaser, above is a picture of some of the beading details on my Casablanca wedding gown.

Kimberly's Bridal Shower

Not only was Kim's birthday yesterday, but we threw her bridal shower on Saturday at a small restaurant in Astoria, Queens called Mojave. If you love Mexican food I would strongly suggest paying them a visit, the food is amazing, the ambiance is great and the staff is excellent. 

I lied to Kim and told her that the two of us were going out to brunch and when she arrived, she was surprised by a host of family and friends. I took a million pics on Saturday, but I chose some of the best shots to share with you guys. Enjoy!!! 

This is Kim when she first arrived to the shower, I was so glad I was able to keep a secret! 

One of my favorite candid shots of the beautiful bride-to-be

Loved this idea, special thanks to C, all of our guests were able to leave a note of love and wisdom! 

(Secret Convo- Kim:" I can't believe you lied to me" Me: "I know me either") 

She looked absolutely gorgeous! 

Here is a picture of the cute favors

Here are some of her fabulous gifts 

We channeled Kim's inner cheerleader.....absolutely my fav pic of the day! 

I opted to not wear heels on Saturday and got stuck at the bottom of all of the pictures

 I know Kim is probably going to kill me for posting this pic, but she got so emotional at the end of the day.  I just had to capture this moment.

So after the bridal shower we were off to her bachelorette party/birthday celebration. This picture was taken when we arrived to the hotel and it captures our friendship to the T!!! This is the behind the scenes look of the friendship I have with Kimmie. 

And the countdown begins, only three weeks left until the big day! 

Pre Marital Counseling Update

Just in case you haven't noticed, I discontinued doing the Pre-Marital counseling session updates because the directions of the sessions have changed.

If you are interested in seeing what a pre-marital counseling outline looks like, check out this post.

Anywho, our sessions have begun to stray from the actual outline and we are focusing more on things that Mr. Man and I feel that we need to work on like *cough*cough* our communication. Although we have been blissfully living together for over a year now, we realize that we are not as well-adjusted as we thought we were these past few months. I can only imagine how couples must feel adjusting with the pressure of being a newlywed and literally combining two different lifestyles under one roof! It is stressful... and just when you think you have your partner down pact. BOOM! Something new pops up that you have to learn to cope with...wait for it... together. 

In our case, I would say the together part is the hardest when conflicts arise because we are both so independant. I have basically lived on my own since I left for college in 2005 because I never stayed at home for more than 1 week since then... and Mr. Man is just all types of amazingly independent emotionally. SOOO, this had brought upon some challenges when a conflict arises. We always come back together to work it out, but sometimes it takes longer. This is where my 3 hour-I'm-basically-trying-to-kill-myself-workouts come in (I won't leave the gym until I burn 1,200 - 1,500 calories). I work out until I am too exhausted to really argue anymore. Great tactic, right?

So we have talked about communication styles, how to compromise and address a problem when it arise, sexual differences and adjustment, in-laws... and then we have broken down some issues that we are each concerned about. Honestly, the experience is amazing and we still have quite a few sessions to go as well! I highly recommend pre-martial counseling to ALL engaged couples, no matter how compatible you are together. There will be a time when the relationship is not perfect anymore (basically leaving the honeymoon stage and entering the comfortable/normal/everyday/real life stage).

If you are on the market for a counselor to conduct these sessions, I highly recommend seeing a counselor with a degree in mental health counseling, social work, or a doctorate in clinical psychology because you want a person who will cover everything! Not to down play the importance of a meeting with your pastor/priest/or another religious official, but you need to make sure that the person conducting the sessions will cover everything that realistically happens in counseling. Our counselor happens to be our pastor who has a doctorate in clinical psychology. He has practiced inside the church, outside of the church, in hospital settings, and in court mandated situations... so he covers it all. Embarrassing at times, since nobody really dreams about talking about the frequency and type of sex you expect in marriage in the church office, but it helps. The nerves will pass if you are truly invested in making sure you have a long lasting, faithful, and happy marriage.

Any engaged/married couples reading who decided to go to a pre-marital counselor before?

Wedding Update: Ivory, Tangerine, and Brown Wedding Invitations

I know I have been completely slacking on my wedding updates... but I have a reason. I kind of refuse to think about the wedding until this semester of grad school is over. I have been completely overwhelmed with school, work, and the little things that life throws in along the way.

However, I am in the process of assembling the invitations! Below is a little preview of what the invitation will look like when it comes out of the envelope. Amber and I stuffed the brown tri-fold envelopes with all of the actual information and then we created the tie using ribbons and the seals. Yes, I know the line could be a bit straighter now that I am seeing it in a photo, but it still looks lovely to me. 

Unfortunately, in the middle of assembling 100+ invites, we ran out of ribbon, so I need to find a dealer where I can order a larger roll of the ivory and tangerine silk ribbons. Hopefully these will be going out by mid-May at the very latest.

Right now though, Mr. Man and I are really wondering how many of our friends will understand that if the envelope is addressed to just them that they will not have a +1/guest. Originally, we wanted to cap our guest list at 125... but it grew to about 152... magically. So since we are so over, we really cannot allow/afford our  unmarried friends to bring a guest. Most of our friends are not engaged or living with their significant other either, so we are hoping that our guests will just be alright with flying solo and enjoy our day with mutual friends.

The response card has a line labeled "M" for the guest to write in their name, and an "accepts"/"regrets" line where they are able to write in how many people are in their party. Mr. Man seems to think that people will just put a check in the accepts/regrets lines instead of a number. But we cannot think of a classy way to avoid this problem.

Are there any brides our there who have dealt with this before?

Wedding Theme: Love Quencher

I completely forgot that I didn't share the wedding inspiration boards that my wedding planner created for me months back! These are not exact images of what the wedding will look like, but it definitely incorporates our general color theme and decor. As the day approaches, I will have more and more pictures of what everything will be looking like.

                                                                 Source: renitaprince.blogspot.com via Kimberly on Pinterest

My wedding planner is Renita from Fabulous Weddings Shoestring Budgets and she is fabulous! If you are looking for a planner, please don't give it a second thought when thinking about calling FWSB!

We need more wedding invitations...

Our actual invites in a different color.

Mr. Man and I have decided to just suck it up... and go over our guest list. We have to guarantee a minimum of 125 guests at our reception. We currently have 149 guests, and I KNOW, we will have at least 1 or 2 people who we may have forgotten, or people who desperately want to have a guest.

We received 75 invitations through our package, which is obviously not enough. So I called one of the vendor coordinators to get an additional 25 invites and I fell over when I heard the price. $431.88 

For 25 invites! You have got to be kidding me. I will be online researching to find a cheaper version or an alternate invite that we can both agree upon.

In the meantime, I purchased ribbons to create a tie to go around the invites that we purchased before. I may just have to post some pictures later to share with everyone. Show off my crafty skills.... or lack there of. 

*** Edited to add! I found our EXACT invites through a private vendor online for $240! Including taxes and shipping!***

Pre Marital Counseling Sessions 2 & 3 Recap

Session 2

This session lasted for about 40 minutes and was very laid back. I think I am just generally on pins and needles, waiting for something earth-shattering to come up in a discussion. We discussed the biblical basis of marriage (Genesis 2 18 - 25), where God created a companion for man by taking one of the man's ribs and creating woman. The "wo" representing the womb. I was raised Roman Catholic, but never really had a strong connection to the church. Now, I just consider myself a Christian. I believe in God, but I do not have much in depth knowledge about scriptures. Being able to site in the Bible where and why God created a woman for man was really interesting to me. 

The Pastor related this to our relationship by stating that marriage is formed in the heart long before it is legalized by a ceremony. Moreover, God may not have given me one of Mr. Man's ribs, but he took parts of us and brought us together. This we both really believe because we met on our own, without help or introductions, and with no mutual contacts. Something, we say God, you may say fate, brought us together. 

We then jumped of topic and starting talking about things that we are cautious about when it comes to getting married and we both agreed that having children makes us nervous. Not because of our families, finances, medical reasons, or anything else like that... but because of society today. This is where I had some strong emotions towards my fiance. It is so different hearing him speak so passionately about a topic that concerns me to someone else. We are pretty private when it comes to intimate details about our relationship, so it is very different for us to talk to anyone openly about our likes, dislikes, fears, and strengths as it relates to our relationship. We both agree that we want to raise our children in a way where they know right from wrong and that they are strong willed and have a value system that many children are without today. 

And this concluded session 2! Not too shabby!

Session 3

This past Saturday, our session took place in the afternoon because we had a funeral to attend in the morning. Obviously, we were a bit drained, so we didn't get into anything too heavy. But we did go over the assessment from the first session. We were there for about 1 hour because we just started having regular conversation about our wedding plans as well. 

The Pastor was so excited to give us the results because they turned out better than he claims he has ever seen before! Our strengths and weaknesses compliment each other and we both have a combination of the same temperaments (supine and sanguine). Based upon our temperaments, we are extremely compatible and won't run into problems based on the "general" way we handle situations, our needs for control, or how we show affection. I was trying to scribble down notes so I could write this post, but the Pastor assured me that he will give us a full report soon. I will wait until them to go through the different types of temperaments and how that affects a marriage. I am just happy to hear that we are in the clear so far!

***If you want to learn more about the 5 temperaments now, check out THIS link.***

Pre-Marital Counseling Outline and Topics

On Saturday Mr. Man and I went to our first pre-marital counseling session at our church. Counseling is not mandatory in our church, but it is often suggested. Our Pastor also holds a Doctorate in Clinical Psychology, so his counseling covers more than the biblical basis of marriage. This was very important to me since I am doing my graduate work in counseling. I believe in God, but I also believe that you need to make sure your relationship is strong and counseling is a great way to help if it is done correctly.

In our first session we took a temperament assessment that will be discussed at out next session. The assessment is so we can learn more about each other's personalities and hopefully understand more about how we operate. Below is the outline of what will be discussed in our upcoming counseling sessions. The only thing that is really missing here is finances which we already have under control, but Pastor said that that will be included as well as a few other topics that are not listed. I also feel that this list could really work for any person who is seeking pre-marital counseling whether they are a Christian or not, just take out section 1 and the word Christian and faith and it will serve as a great outline.

1. The Biblical basis of marriage
• Its divine origin
• The Mosaic Law and the family
• Jesus on the subject of marriage
• Paul on the subject of marriage
2. The requirement for a successful Christian marriage
• The necessity of the new birth
• The importance of compatibility
• The influences of one's cultural background
• The necessity for similar educational experiences
• Taking a partner of like faith
• Communication
• Ethnic Background
• Racial Background
3. Role concepts in Christian marriage
• Confusion of roles in today's society
• Definition of roles
• The scriptural role concepts of the wife
• The scriptural role concepts of the husband
4. Adjustment in Christian marriage
• Necessity of adjustment
• Psychological adjustment
• Time required for adjustment
• Sexual adjustment
5. Adjustment to In-laws
• In-law problems caused by parents
• In-law problems caused by married children
• Major periods of adjustment with In-laws
6. Counseling and family problems
• Counseling saves marriages
• Reasons for not seeking help
• When counseling is needed
• Successful Christian counseling involves both partners
• The necessity for seeking help early

Save the Dates have been ordered!

Save the Dates are off the checklist!

The lovely save the date to your left is what the fiance and I ordered this past weekend. The couple pictured is not us, and we changed the pea-green to a carrot color to match out color theme.

There were ordered directly from the Magnet Street website. They are 2" x 3.5" and they automatically come with cute lined envelopes. the ETA is 7 - 10 days, so sadly I will not have my dream of a Holiday Card and Magnet double mailing, but more of a New Year's surprise! (At this point, I am almost positive that I will be mailing out very few holiday cards, actually. Time has completely escaped me this  year.)

The site is super user friendly, so hopefully the magnets will be a-okay and ready to go. I was able to get 100 magnets with the color customization for a little over $100. I thought that was pretty good! 

THE Wedding Dress!

Meet Casablaca 2037

If you have been following my wedding posts, you will note that this isn't one of the dresses that I was eyeing. But I went with an open mind because I couldn't find a shop that carried my beloved Essence of Australia dress. 

This gown was not only the first gown that I tried on that day BEFORE Kendra and Adorae, but it is the most affordable. I was more than ready to spend all of my dress budget and I only ended up spending HALF. Yes, I said half.

I will be adding a beaded belt to this dress though, probably about 1.5 inches wide around the waist for some added bling. If anyone has any pointers, please let me know!

I am so happy that this part is over with, no onto Save-The-Dates and the bridesmaid dresses!

The Instituion of Marriage

As a soon to be newly-wed, it is so hard to to think about and listen to everything that is being said in the media about Marriage in America. This morning on the Gayle King Show on XM Radio, Gayle King brought up a really good point in reference to the Kim Kardashian mess that is going on. (Note: I am an avid Kim K fan, however, she is a celebrity, and most celebrities seem to do the same thing when they get married. Break up.)
Any who, she noted that the LGBTQ community must be a bit enraged when they see how heterosexual couples who have never really had to fight for marriage take it so lightly. It seems like absolutely nothing for people to get married and then get divorced in the US. Our countries divorce rate is something like 50% right now! Crazyness!
As a soon to be wife, I take marriage very seriously. I want to do whatever I can do to make sure that I am prepared and ready to make the lifetime commitment.

Is it hard? Yes.

Is there always temptation around? Duh!

Have I made mistakes? Yes.

But I am willing to do what it takes to prepare myself and my fiance for the journey that we are about to embark on. I am in love with reading about happy couples like Faith over at Life.Love & Marriage. I feel that is may be easier to stay married if I "surround" myself with positive people who believe in marriage and in long-lasting love. Yes, I don't really know Faith outside of the internet, BUT I feel like I get to know her just-a-tad through blogging, and I love the positive example she sets for us young couples out here.

Results of Dress Shopping

I have narrowed it down to 3 absolutely fabulous gowns that I will be choosing from. 1 of which, I was not able to try on yet, BUT I am already in love with it  and made an appointment for this Saturday to meet her in person.

Weigh in, and let me know what you think!

Meet D1237 (She really does need a name...)

                                                                             Source: theknot.com via Candice on Pinterest

Meet Kendra (minus the shall on the website)

Source: google.co.uk via Tabitha on Pinterest

Meet Adorae

Last week I was completely dreading shopping, but I think it has finally hit me. AND I am actually excited and looking forward to making a decision. 

Wedding Dress Shopping

UUUUUGH...... Wedding Dress Shopping

I know, "uuuuugh" is not the word I should be using to describe the joy-filled hours that I will be experiencing on Saturday. BUT I have so much anxiety about it. Physically, I am not prepared (i.e. I have not lost any weight) and mentally I am just overwhelmed and stressed out.

I have been getting not so subliminal hints from friends, family, and bridal salons that I need to get my john-brown-hind-parts into a salon asap, so I bit the bullet and made a preliminary appointment yesterday.

And I literally had heart-palpitations.

And FYI: I plan on going once with friends and then once with my mother and my soon to be mother-in-law. I am praying that the actual experience will be much better than the anxiety that I have been feeling. 

Wish me luck! And of course, I will post an update.

*** And just in case anyone is curious, I am going to Lillette's Bridal. It was salon that came highly recommended by one of my coworkers who purchased her wedding dress, bridesmaid dresses and did all of her alterations there.***

Wedding Beauty Preparation

In all of my wedding reading, I always find bridal beauty countdowns and checklists on how to prepare yourself for the BIG day. The one below is definitely one of my favorites and most realistic from Get Married magazine.I  have added a few tips and tricks that I have come across as well, but the basics are from Get Married magazine.

8 - 12 months

• Test out new hair looks. You never want to do this too close to your big day because if something goes wrong there may or may not have enough time for a correction. Hair grows about 1/2 inch every month. You also want to make sure that you look like yourself on the day off. If you are going from a blond to a brunette; you may need a few months to get used to the new you!
• Discuss all major skin concerns. If you have any major concerns, you want to have enough time to start working on them. Seeing a dermatologist around this time is perfect to get started on a proactive and preventive regimen.
• Consult a personal trainer for a fitness routine if you are looking to get into shape or tone up for the big day. Looking to get skinny or tone up like me!? You need enough time to develop a solid routine AND see results so starting close to a year ahead of time is perfecto.

5 - 7 months

• Start growing out your hair if you are looking to grow out your locks OR experiment with a shorter look. If you are looking to grow out your locks start trying to eliminate heat styling and give yourself a scalp massage or two. And don't forget to trim split ends (every 3 months is recommended).
• Define your skin care regime. This is the time to start looking into correcting smaller issues like oily, dry or itchy skin by visiting an aesthetican. You can also start monthly facials to ensure that you have a glow on the day off. This is also the time to examine eating habits, removing stains from your teeth and starting a solid nail maintenance initiative.

3 - 4 months

• Book all of your trial hair appointments. If you are sticking with the good and faithful stylist that has always done your hair then you are good to go. If you are looking for that special someone, now is the time to start hunting. Ideally, you should get to know your stylist ahead of time so you are not just seeing them on your trial and on the day off.
• Begin conducting a search for a makeup artist.  This is a very important task because every woman want to put her best face forward on that day. Even if you are not going to have extra glitz and glam on that day, you want someone to be able to give you the look that you are desiring without any confusion or problems. Many people note that once you find a makeup artist you BOOK THEM ASAP. No excuses on missing out if you follow this rule. You also want to confirm that they will be suing the same products on the day of your wedding to ensure that you won't be breaking out from trying anything new.

1 - 2 months

• Begin the makeup and hair trials! On the day of your trial, try to wear a white t-shirt with a similar neckline as the dress so you can get an idea of what it will look like. Make sure to voice your opinion in a non-Naomi Campbell way to make sure you get the look you are going for. AND don't forget to take a picture so you can bring it on your big day and it is easier for the stylists to visualize the look again.
• Do some eyebrow shaping maintenance. This can really make or break your wedding day makeup. Chose your method (tweezing, threading or waxing) carefully and be sure not to make them too thin because eyebrow hairs take FOREVER to grow back!
• Kick your workout into high(er) gear to reap the day-off benefits!  You need to make sure that your workout and new body improvements are long lasting. In order to maintain, sometimes you need to work a little higher. Don't be afraid to grab some heavier weights or try that new intense spinning class at the gym.

2 Weeks

• Schedule a trim and a color touch up. Always allow yourself time to adjust AND time to correct a mishap.

1 Week

• Get one last hydrating facial!  But this time NO EXTRACTIONS which can cause redness. This is also the time to do a little bit of brow maintenance and not be red for the big day.
• Slow down your exercising routine. You don't want to lose any extra pounds so the dress doesn't fit. Lord knows that the stress of the big day will be more than enough. Try to even squeeze in a massage if you have a moment.
• Hit the nail salon for a relaxing mani/pedi. You need at least 1 or 2 appointments to make sure that all hangnails and broken nails are tamed before the final mani-pedi for the big day.

1 Day to Go!!!

• RELAX! and get that final Mani/Pedi for the big day to help you out with that.  If you have morning wedding, try washing your hair the night before so some of the natural oils will be there when the stylist is ready to style your hair. Dirty hair is best for holding a style. If the wedding is in the evening, go ahead and wait to give it a wash in the am.

The BIG HUGE MASSIVE Day

•  You should be able to make a list at your trial session and purchase them well in advance. This goes for nail polish too. Purchase the color that you will be wearing on the day off in case you need a quick touch up.
• EAT, EAT, EAT! Now don't stuff yourself so that you can't breath in your beautiful gown, but make sure you enjoy all of the good food that you worked so hard to pick out for your guests. This includes eating breakfast before the day begins. This will also keep you energized and ready to smile for all of those pictures throughout the day.

I know this was a super long post! But I know I am working my way down the list too. So hopefully this can help another bride-to-be.