I met some really great people in college, most of whom I still keep in contact with but on a different level. Personally, I don't take friendships lightly, if I call you my friend that's exactly what you are, and you actually become more like family. However, sometimes I feel that people, like myself, hold on to relationships and friendships because of the years and time that was invested. So I began to think, how can I still call a person my "Best Friend" if we don't even talk anymore? Yeah we're still cool and we can totally still have a good time together, but I feel that if I am constantly reaching out to you and not receiving anything in return, what is the point?
When it comes to letting go, it's hard, there is no way to walk around it. Once some type of friendship or relationship has evolved there is absolutely no way to fake the funk. Of course you are going to be hurt if you no longer talk to the person that you felt knew you the best, or the person that you thought you would spend the rest of your life with. Emotions are something else, so many people hang on to relationships and friendships that are toxic, all because they are not at the point where they can let go. Letting go is definitely a process, and you really have to be in the right state of mind. My philosophy is that if I am the one that is constantly getting hurt, crying at night, depressed and stressed out and you are sound asleep at night and living life like it's golden, there is definitely a problem.
A friend, girlfriend, boyfriend, companion or whoever should add to your life not take away from it, and most importantly they shouldn't become draining. In a perfect world everyone would be madly in love, and every friendship would be perfect; but let's face the facts, there are going to be hills and mountains in every relationship you have, romantic or not.
Ever so often I log onto my Facebook Account and begin my cleaning out process, where I go through my friends list and begin to delete people. You would not believe how long it takes me, there are so many people that I still keep as friends and I know that I don't talk to them, but I always say to myself well maybe we'll reconnect and it never happens. So my rule of thumb is that if you don't at least write on my wall for my birthday, DELETE it is. I mean seriously my birthday shows up on your news feed, #imjustsaying. Honestly, whatever is meant to be will be, you cannot force a relationship to work especially if you are working by yourself, it becomes a lost cause.
So I think that in addition to cleaning out my Facebook friends I am going to take the time to clean out some people in my life; it may sound harsh but at this point in my life not everyone is meant to travel with me on my journey. Some people are meant to be in your life for just a season while others will last throughout a lifetime, it's your choice to make the distinction!